Wednesday, July 28, 2010

A letter to my daughter as I contemplate the world she will soon discover....

My dear sweet daughter Anastasia:

You are not even here yet, but already I love you more than is humanly possible. I have carried you around in my body for the past 9/10 months and shared with you my joy, pain and some great eats, as you grew and grew into the baby that I am so lucky and blessed to meet in just a few short days, or even hours. I have complained about how you hurt my back, made my boobs grow indecently, and slowed down my daily activities, but all of these complaints pale in comparison to the joy that I feel when I am aware of your little squirming body pressing on my tummy. Feeling your toes stretch against me at night as I lay in bed reading aloud to you.

I waited for you dear sweet daughter. I made sure I was ready. I took years to run around and have silly fun, traveling and experiencing life as a single independent woman and then I met your daddy. I made sure he was a good man. The kind that will love you with more love than I can even describe. He is kind, patient and provides well. He is well-educated, loves my zaniness and crazy fashion obsessed silliness and most of all , he loves us. If something should ever happen to me, he is a good man, and will provide for you everything a child should ever need.

Now, we are ready for you.

We have a nice safe home, have made your room as pretty and comfortable as it can be and spoiled you with feminine pretty things so you will be fussed over and adored. We are ready financially, emotionally and physically to provide the care and love that two stable, older parents can give.

The world is not perfect, my love.

Mommy didn't want to bring you into a world with hate crimes, injustice, and war. But, there is too much good and too much hope not to bring you in at all.

And, hopefully by the time you are old enough to realize what is going on, the world will be better and better. All we can do is teach you how to be strong, independent and well-read. To go outside and appreciate nature. To visit farms and find out where food and animals come from. To visit musuems and theatres, travel to far off lands and discover the array of cultures out there. Mommy promises to let you eat anything you want to try (even Bacon), as long as you have an open mind. I will try not to teach you any prejudice or bias, that women can be anything they want to be (even President someday) and to support you in your pursuit of your hopes and dreams. If you want to be an artist or actor, I promise to find the best teachers and drag you around to all of the lessons like my mommy did. If you are more drawn to science or math, your daddy will help you discover the planets, and figure out which bugs are which and the difference between a cricket and a grasshopper.

I will teach you to read, enjoy all different genres of music, and teach you how to speak the basics in French, Italian and Spanish. We will shop together, share ice cream cones and cookies when we are having a bonding day, and I will help you pick out the perfect pink for your toes!!

I have no idea if you will be a redhead, a brunette or have strawberry blond hair like I did when I was little. But I promise you I will think you are the most beautiful little girl in the entire universe no matter your eye color, hair color or tone of skin. Because you were created by me and your Daddy and when I look at your face, I will see us. I will see our love. And you are my love.

I cannot wait to meet you (but please hurry up..your mommy is a mush, and I need to stop crying now).

Until your birthday my love,
I will wait...

Love Mommy...


Anonymous said...

You are so cute. I love the thought you put into your letter to D, and it may very well be a great help to him. Labor and delivery are such wild and amazing experiences and it is hard to know what exactly will happen. The only advise I can give you is to have a plan, but be open to deviating from the plan if need be. It will not be the end of the world if things don't go the way you have always dreamed they would. The important thing is that both you and baby Ana stay safe and healthy. Ask D to keep in close communication with the nurses and docs so he can tell you what is happening if they are not communicating as well as you would like. The muffins and treats are a good way to keep the staff happy while they wait with you for your little princess to come into this world. Just don't get mad that you aren't allowed to eat any of them ;-)

Looking forward to seeing photos when she gets here! I am just so pleased for you both. Being a parent is the toughest, scariest, most rewarding job you could possibly ever have. It truly makes life so much more amazing than you could possibly imagine!

All my best

Stephanie said...

Absolutely beautiful, Zoe. You will be a fabulous mom. Ana is a very lucky little girl. Thinking about you this week and hoping for a healthy & quick labor & delivery! All the best to you and your family!


Anonymous said...

A very touching and wonderful letter. You will be a great mother.

Julie Kieras said...

Thanks for inviting me to check out your blog! It's so cute - and this letter is very touching! :) I can relate to so much of it!! :)
Julie from A Year With Mom and Dad